It would be neat to have a photo of a redhead to go in here. Edit: Found one! LOL Since I’ve been doing Blot for Thorr I keep seeing redheads everywhere. Wonderful! Going from monotheism, though it be some time ago now, to polytheism is an interesting move. For one thing, there are plenty of Heathens (Heidhni?) who feel a strong affiliation for one Goddess or God… Yet almost everyone worships all the Aesir and Vanir at appropriate times, not to mention respect for landwights and ancestors. All of elohim seems to be well covered. ;-)

Currently I’m feeling this great affinity with Thorr. He’s a protective influence but without being smothering or dominating. Feels wonderful. The situation raises some questions about whom I’m following or who is doing the directing of all the little coincidences that are piling up in my life. Getting to know the Goddesses is also worthwhile, though admittedly I haven’t been doing as much of that consciously.

Most Heathens write about their Goddesses and Gods being ‘elder kin’ rather than slave drivers. They’re not jealous, controlling or foul tempered. Nor is one expected to give up control of one’s own life in service to them or for any other reason. The connection feels much more like a partnership relationship. This approach reminds me of the subject of process theology, whereby the will of the individual was theoretically rehabilitated and seen as useful, to be engaged in the development of spirituality as distinct from the ‘I am an unworthy worm and I submit unquestioningly’ school of worship. If you’ve read any of Aleister Crowley’s thoughts you’ll recognise an ironic influence here.

At this point it should be mentioned that there were a variety of views on God in christendom, there were plenty of sources to point to Jesus’ God being Fatherlike, with the unfortunate shift in practise toward him appearing more as an abusive father… There’s such difference between what I was studying in theology at Whitley and what seems to pass for popular belief in xianity. All up I spent 9 1/2 years in that study, and I can tell you I saw an enormous diversity! I have no regrets regarding dumping christendom, however I feel obliged to acknowledge the open mindedness and hard work of the professors at Whitley. Embracing Heathendom is probably not the outcome they expect for most students, however, if you’re analysing faith and belief, why remain subject to a faith that was forced on you if it isn’t working for you and has been quite harmful?

Getting to know the Aesir and Vanir is not as much of a challenge as it would seem without the kind of authority that ‘scripture’ is touted to be. There’s plenty of scope for one’s own experience and development in relationship and as mentioned above they aren’t jealous about these things. This is rather something new for me, the realisation that although I’m currently feeling this great sense of Thorr’s presence, it doesn’t infringe on my awareness of Odin or Freya at work in my life. And Odin is very much at work!

Last night after all the family related stuff came up again, specifically thinking about adoption and life on the margins, I went to bed in something of a temper. Feeling rather despondent… Funny how that seems to be becoming a sore point. When I was younger it was simply a fact of life. Now it bothers me when people are discussing family and origins. I’m more and more reluctant to have the subject arise in conversation. Anyways, I went to bed early and was feeling considerably unhappy about my circumstances. The conversations about family and origins had lifted the lid on a whole seething mass of unresolved issues. Odin seemed to say to me that this would be something to deal with. I was not happy and laughed at him sourly “I deal with this every damn day!” Then in Terry Pratchett’s Witches Abroad which I was re-reading for about the fourth time, the page opened to a mention that witches never run away from things they fear. Pffft. Synchronous events can be confronting at times.

Today while reading further on runes and runelore, I dived into an essay about Othala, the rune of inheritance, family connections, lands… All the background of humanity that comes to you down through the generations. Needless to say it felt rather like I was having my nose rubbed in it. Meditating on this rune and exploring it’s importance in my life should be fun… for a given value of fun. LOL. Probably connects substantially with the experience of the land claiming me that I was recounting in yesterday’s post.

Suffice it to say that if any information about my origins comes to light now, after years of searching and invariably heartbreaking dead ends, it would be a bloody miracle. I’m not sure if that’s what the Allfather has up his sleeve, is anyone, ever? Anyways, it’s certainly an intense journey.


atypical Saturday



That there’s my dear old Djembe. As you can see she is a bit the worse for wear… yet somehow still manages to sound quite good.

The other night while I was up painting, the neighbours came over to invite me to a Hindu Goddess shindig. A couple of years ago after they’d first moved in there, we were sitting around discussing some images they had on the walls. Hindu can be a *very* broad church, you see. They also asked about my beliefs. I wasn’t sure how the whole “witch” deal would go down, and they’d read Dan Brown so I simply said I was a Goddess worshipper which was very true. It seemed to be something we had very much in common, a respect for the earth and the feminine principle of fertility and generosity. Which isn’t to say there isn’t a male fertility and generosity, but that’s simply not what we were tuned in to at the time.

Anyways, when they came over the other night, Punja made a point of emphasising that it was all about the Goddess and being very grateful for their new home and the blessings of life in general. It might have been mainly one of those “invite the neighbours so they won’t call the cops on you” deals, but when asked about drumming they said yes there would be drumming and I was most welcome to bring mine.

Saturday day I’d been down to catch up with all my witchy girls and everyone was commenting on my brilliant energy. Thanks very much to a French Shaman who’s been doing a bit of work on me. Amazing work, I must add! Something that could have and should have been fixed years ago, but who else would have known how to do it? Considering all the prayers and blessings and healings I’ve had from many and various sources over the years, some of whom thought they were absolutely the wasp’s nipples but did bugger all but make a lot of noise.

The chief high scary fairy asked what was going on. I told her I’d found a God. Heh. She laughed.
“Such a difference since when you first came. You would have castrated any God who came within coo-ee of you.” LOL
“With a rusty razor blade” I replied. They were all raised eyebrows to hear that it was Odin who’d reached in to turn things around. Yes, it is the frame that everything needed and it is obviously working very well.

It was a great catch up. We were all talked out by mid afternoon and I was feeling quite satisfied. The Saturday evening event was in the back of my mind, but since it seemed quiet I wasn’t sure what was happening and didn’t want to barge in. Over the last few weeks and particularly over Beltaine I’ve had a very transitional energy going on and lots of changes. There were a couple of events I was invited to and missed out on because my energy wouldn’t have contributed to the group. It was very disappointing to miss a highlight like Beltaine. In addition I was feeling peeved after falling out with a big wig in the nearest Asatru Garth and am probably uninvited to any of their stuff, which left me feeling very high and dry. The invitation was a welcome surprise and in one way a real indicator of the forces that are at work in my life at the moment. So despite my uncertainty, it was an invitation I could not refuse.

At about 10.30 I eventually decided to go and find out what was happening. Turns out they were all up the back of the house, drumming and singing away before a beautiful red and gold decked shrine of the Goddess Amba. It was magnificent. She is dressed beautifully, with eight arms holding all sorts of things including weapons, and riding a tiger. There were all manner of offerings laid out before her, a halved coconut, large trays piled high with fruit, sweets and other lovely things. The only thing I could think of to bring was some coriander from the garden and incense, which were well recieved. The energy of the celebration was deeply impressive, almost tangible. The nearest link I can find presently is for Durga. Hope to have some more pics of the night shortly.

For some time I hung around down the back of the crowd. LOL A few dozen Indian folks and one Eastern Asian looking woman and I was the only white chick in the place. And man, have I never felt so white! Haha. :-) They were all dressed beautifully too. It was really impressive how pretty they all were. Really pretty, men and women, young and old both. Must be like walking onto a Bollywood set with all the colours and jewellery. Crowds of people, sweat and perfume, and you’re in the midst of it all. Goddess warmth.

The welcome was memorable. No one looked twice really, except to smile at me. No one questioned why I was there or what I thought I was doing. No one bothered that I wasn’t of the “right” race to be attending to the Goddess. No one asked about my efforts in the Hindu faith to be welcomed into the ceremony. To be honest, their hospitality rather put me to shame. And most of all there were no strings. No expectation of conversion or other demonstration… I was there to contribute to the worship and that was all good. Heh. In a way with the mix we were having a serious Indo-European devotion. :D

The musicians were quite good and since I haven’t played for a while, and certainly not anything Indian, I hung back despite the hostess wanting to drag me up in front of everyone and introduce me. Eventually she had her way and it all fell into place surprisingly well. The drummer offered an idea where to start. He said “1… 2… 3… 4…” Hehe. :D In Indian drumming it isn’t so straightforward. Eastern drummers can use all sorts of strange signatures that our westernised ears don’t pick up well if we’ve grown up on top 40 radio. Fortunately I haven’t ;-)

Anyways, it was sink or swim, so I picked a simple line from what he started with and away we went. And it flew! At the end of the first track I was feeling quite a bit more confident. He gave me a thumbs up. What he actually said was “You play very well and I can really use the support.” Wow. So, that’s how we played. I nailed down the rhythm and he went off. They had said they expected it to go till around midnight. Needless to say we were still going well after 1.

It’s incredible how drumming can carry you away. Early on before joining in playing, simply rocking and clapping in time to the music with everyone else, I had a vision of her… She was laughing, smiling at me. Quite happy to acknowledge that I was there yet not “one of hers” so to speak. She actually said to me that Frigga wanted me, and laughing, reached out and touched my head where the bindi would be. I wasn’t in the same devotional bag as everyone else there, but it didn’t matter since I was there to participate and it was very much considered A. Good. Thing.

At the end of the night there was dinner and the offerings from the altar were divided up and distributed amongst the attendants. It was explained to me as sharing in the blessings of the Goddess. That was neat to participate in that. Whether she be known by a Hindu name or in a different manifestation as Freya, Nerthus, Gaia or even simply Earth Mother, it’s a spirit worth acknowledging. For some time I’ve been on and on about participating respectfully in the life of the planet, and this was another iteration of that idea. A very enjoyable one, too. Might have to head up to the Sri Durga temple up the road some time and drum with them. Until enough mad Heathens turn up around here to form a drumming circle.

The Gods and Goddesses of the ancient pantheons still surprise me how open they can be. No doubt not every one would be in the same frame of mind as Amba, but things are very different to the crawling, rules and distance that I’d grown up with. And things are happening.

Well, I’ve hardly had any sleep and as you can tell my mind is going a million miles an hour. LOL Things will probably be a bit wild for a little while, as that repairing the Shaman did takes effect…

Whew. Heh. How good is this!! And what a change from the last few months. I really do need some sleep ;-)

Art for gods’ sake, or I don’t like the drugs…


There’s been some ideas floating around in my tiny mind for a little while now, images for more artwork.

Last night I popped a couple of painkillers and stayed up late listening to Marilyn Manson, Rob Zombie and Nine Inch Nails working on this. It’s in progress… The thought of including reference to a couple of runes, like Sig and Berkana came to mind, but one hears horror stories of newbies playing with rune magic and getting their fingers, if not their whole arms, incinerated. So I intend to play it safe with that stuff. Alluring though it is! Are they moth wings I feel growing on my back?

I’m one of these people who goes fast on downers. It’s not unknown, though probably not common. Something about the drug clears my mind and enables some sort of focus on the creative process. It short circuits the emotionally conditioned restraints and repression. Though insightful readers might also observe that it would take pain killers of some sort to have one want to stay up till 2am painting and listening to metal… ;-) Heh. There’s that twitch again.

A friend of mine who’s a well qualified psychologist has commented to me regarding the numbers of people with PTSD symptoms who use opiate pain killers. She feels it’s something to do with a physical, muscular memory of a traumatic event. Training of various kinds, martial arts drilling, sports practise and even music, can create muscle memories. Apparently there’s a more sinister form we’re predisposed to. The fact that the body’s own endorphin receptors closely match the opiates might have something to do with the preference. My friend tells me that she knows of many people who, regardless of any other anti-depressants or prescription medications they might be taking, seem to end up back with the pain killers from time to time.

Not that the similarity in function between the body’s receptors and the drug is any accident. No miracles here. More like thousands of years of co-evolution. For how long have humans cultivated and taken drugs? For how much longer before that were they used (and still used) from the wild for inducing altered states? You wonder how much of the modern human brain is a result of systematic experimentation over generations during our evolution. It’s certainly not a new thing. Criminalising it, however, is. While there would no doubt have been cultural frameworks for such use, the demonisation and criminalisation of drug users in the global kleptocracy seems to be out of all proportion. Apart from creating folk demons to vilify in order to further enforce social control, what’s the point of being so nasty to people who are simply trying to anesthetise themselves? The good old limited news knee jerk in operation. And generations of politicians get themselves re-elected by enacting laws against people they define as “other”, with little or no thought to the social ramifications or the reality of life and community.

And this becomes relevant yet again, as the Victorian Government (no pun intended ;-)) has recently begun demonising biker gangs (again) so as to attempt to validate another push for law and order. No effective point in it at all. You can’t fix a problem with the same thinking that created it. Law and order in this instance is simply smoke and mirrors for a Government that’s on thin ice come the next election, regardless of any better alternative.

Note also that some atypical opiates are recognised as being effective anti-depressants… But when the patents expire, they aren’t nearly so sexy.

There’s also a pretty well established connection between creative types and altered mind states. From Victorian poets getting stoned off their nuts on Opium to contemporary Heroin use among muso’s… Not that I’d advocate unrestrained usage… There’s potential for damage and addiction to consider. We probably need that cultural framework for drug use to set the stage, so to speak. In this as in so many other situations the person taking responsibility for their own experimentation needs to have a basis of self-control and development in order to use an altered state constructively.

Now this is a bit of a tangent, but one that would do well to address. A lot of religious and spiritual teaching seems to take a template of behaviours or virtues and attempt to apply them to a person from the outside. The Greco-Roman purity codes in christendom being a prime example. In puritan religion they’re completely off the chart. The current tendency for Governments to try to legislate morality is another case. The controls are operating externally so that the standards of behaviour or thought are being forced onto a person from the outside, like a stamp into concrete. It’s an external impression, rather than one that develops from within. And it’s generally effected with the aid of a truck load of emotional manipulation and what boils down to psychological abuse.

It’s a vastly different approach to cast off all that expectation and follow one’s own nose. Think of every prophet or spiritual journeyman who’s reconsidered the church’s teachings and decided to wander off in search of their own meaningful spiritual experience, their own relationship with and understanding of god. There’s a whole history of people run out of town on the end of pitch forks or brutally murdered, an effective lesson to anyone else who gets ideas about freedom. One needs to be very, very brave indeed to travel paths not approved of by controlling interests.

Again it’s a painful, awful experience, but hugely valuable, to focus on the internal self, and develop to the point where limits and behaviours are an expression of the inner self and desire for balance and creativity, rather than simply toeing someone else’s line. Naturally not everyone wants to devote the time and suffering to such development. Equally as naturally those benefitting from global culture would probably be horrified if too many people desired to become conscious of the manipulation and control that goes on and attempt to develop their own inner compass. Not only is it highly valuable for the individual concerned, but what they are then able to contribute back into the community is vastly superior in terms of it’s creative contribution. If said community is willing to move forward. ;-)

That’s the curiosity I have with the Nine Noble Virtues in Asatru. Yes, some people are going to want that kind of guidance and a source of centring for their moral code, an agreed upon series of objectives for the sake of security. But why, if one has access to the freedom and tools for magic and development, would one cast off one set of chains in exchange for another? If you’re going to go to the trouble of changing so much of what you’ve been brought up to believe, surely it’s worth the trouble to go another mile and sort your core values from the inside out? It does, however, take an awful lot of emotional energy to maintain the kind of effort it requires to filter, even semi-consciously, the influences operating on people these days. Every ad will try to push a button somewhere in you. And they’re hugely sophisticated. All of which is not to say that the Virtues are not a good thing in themselves. It helps to have a frame of reference for any group interested in spiritual practise and development. I am simply clarifying my own approach of “do as you will shall be the whole of the law.” Not one that goes over well in convict culture. ;-)

And while I’m jumping around all over the place on wild tangents I thought I’d wonder out loud about a thought that came to me this morning some time. I had a bit of a moment with the Hebrew god, basically a parting of the ways. Thanks, seeya and all that. In some way I feel there was a connection there with something, however manipulated and inappropriate it may have been. Spiritual connections are always powerful for me and perhaps we both got something from my journey of questioning and discovery… Certainly the Hebrew god as I came to understand him had way too much in common with Odin to be coincidence. I’ve been on the hook for a long, long time. Someone, I think it may have been Jordsvin, made the comment that “It wasn’t my own faith, it was someone else’s that I’d picked up along the way.” That makes a lot of sense. My expression would be that it wasn’t my faith, it was someone else’s that was given to me when I didn’t know any better.

After all, Odin’s claimed me now. I had this amazing vision whereby the Hebrew god sort of pulled my soul away from himself and released me on the breeze like a spider borne on a thread of silk… Odin reached out his hand and caught the thread, which he passed to Frigga who, smiling, wove me into the work on her loom. Now that’s magic.

Makes you wonder exactly who is underneath all the weird and not so wonderful stuff people have done with the spirit that inspired christendom… I mean, these days I’m not so sure about the whole Jesus thing at all. Street corner prophets were a dime a dozen in Roman occupied Palestine. There is so little original material of anything in the New Testament as well. It seems to me possible that the sayings and stories might well be sourced from more than one person or tradition. In addition the idea of the last supper and the crucifixion and resurrection are not part of the earliest writings. They do follow the practises of the Mithraic cult and were introduced later. Much later still came the idea of Jesus as the Christ, hundreds of years after the fact. Crucifixion didn’t make Jesus the Christ, a meeting of Roman bishops and powermongers did, 400 years later.*

So now if the man or men were not as they’re popularly described today, which is very likely, who exactly is the spirit behind the whole deal as we see it in operation today? Given some of the teachings around, some of them seem to be pretty vicious deceptive spirits. Somewhere in there also is something like a Buddha consciousness and somewhere buried under all the social conditioning, Imperial politics and self-interested dogma is elohim. And you can go look up that word in some progressive source before you jump to conclusions :D

Anyways. Just a thought. ;-)

*Which doesn’t derail the metaphor, similar to Odin hanging on the world tree, that we become more than we are through these journies.


This year has been absolutely the worst experience with depression ever, and I’ve had some bad ones. I’d write that I feel like I’m emerging from it but I thought that in early October too and turned out to be wrong. It’s probably simply another matter of biding my time and letting everything do what it needs to. Whether I understand what “everything” is or not.

Since April I’ve been wrestling the worst and blackest experience of emptiness and deep, deep misery. Fortunately there are odd occasions when the sun comes through. Like the present. I’m told that it’s “transitional”. There’s simply more stuff lingering around from past experiences that needs some sort of psychic regurgitation to feel dealt with. What I have is not simply depression but Borderline Personality Disorder that looks (and feels) a lot like PTSD. Rather than extending from an episode of trauma in the adult life, it develops during childhood.

The idea that all of this is somehow hard wired because of being a result of childhood trauma has been, pradoxically, a relief. There’s a kind of legitimacy now. Someone else gets it, which means that although I’m mental and it is all in my head, it is also very real.

The future is not “dealing with it” or “getting over it” or even really “moving on”. It’s management. Coping with life and people and nothing more. This way of thinking is providing some space for me currently to take a breath and look at what changes I’d like to make and how I might go about such. This is something I’d categorise as A Good Idea. I don’t care what Satan’s little helpers over at News Limited think of this perspective. Anyone who makes money out of exploiting people who are struggling with psycho-spiritual questions and mental illness deserves what’s coming to them. That means you too, Rudd. Bloody Sydney Anglicans.

In the midst of all of this, I’m trying my own little tricks within my own worldview that gives me access to magic and witch craft. Without going into too much detail, good, healthy male archetypes and a solid sense of self empowerment and self-control are not only beneficial but effected through magic ritual. Developing healthy male and female archetypes is obviously going to be a challenge and a help to someone dealing with child abuse. A male who isn’t necessarily an agent of destruction and a female capable of independence and, well, capability… Bring on the ancient deities. (BTW, anyone need a friend for Beltaine?)

I’m not sure how much to write about the internal stuff. I’d like to rant on about every little thing I’ve been experiencing lately spiritually, but that seems somehow to cheapen it.

After reading Richard Dawkins I must admit I was deeply influenced. Heh, I even became facebook friends with P Z Meyers because I appreciate the critical thinking of Atheism. Meyers’ wit makes me want to convert. :D However, I need a world view that will help me make sense of my own experiences, so there needs to be some scope for either something like a quantum mechanical collapse of super consciousness… Like that proposed by Amit Goswami, or a collective unconscious such as proposed by Jung. Since mainstream religions don’t do it for me, and even supposed alternatives based on Hinduism and Buddhism can somehow import a lot of right-wing judgmental assumptions into “new age” belief systems, it’s right back to the drawing board for me.

Witch craft provides the option of the eclectic. Take what you need and leave what you don’t. Together with some Uni training, this provides the space to read and research and measure theories against one’s own experiences this is very liberating! Some might opine that this disconnects an individual from any organised or authorised moral code, and nothing outside such a system could really be legitimate. The problem is that such “authorised” belief systems these days unfortunately include an awful lot of assumption and enforced emotional attachments through psychological manipulation and conditioning.

That’s why there’s little point engaging a religious person who feels that abortion is wrong because a foetus is vulnerable. Every human who’s physical existence can be threatened by another person or circumstances is equally as vulnerable as the unborn foetus. The trouble is that forcing a woman to give birth to a child she can’t feed and who won’t be supported socially is going to maintain the vulnerability not only of the child but will potentially endanger the rest of the family as well. But the emotional conditioning in organised religion and particularly in the kind of right-wing charismatic conservative thinking so prominent in the West today detrimentally affects the thinking of a person who may otherwise want to question the assumptions taught to them about such values or situations. Emotional conditioning, overlearned stereotypes, social conformity… It’s a lot of overhead to try to deal with in order to discuss personal choices.

If you’re going to step out from under the umbrella (or jackboot) of authorised moral thinking, you’re going to be going out on a limb. If you’re dealing social and personal management issues you’re half way out there already. It’s a big responsibility getting your head around a way to understand the Universe. That might be why the myth of the long, dark night seems to continuous in human experience. From the Mithraic last supper, death and resurrection, to the christian version of same, to Odin hanging on the world tree for nine days seeking wisdom… Doing the psycho-spiritual crisis and reinvention is clearly no novelty for the human animal.

And I’m going to use that to segue clumsily into a reference to my current reading on Saxon (not Anglo-Saxon) history and spirituality, and the contemporary Heathen reconstructions of Norse and Saxon spiritualities. Because Odin is cool ;-) (Heh, for me. For the moment.(Spot the theology student!))

Where all this goes, who knows? It’s keeping my head above water. I do actually feel like there are some constructive changes going on somewhere in there. Stay tuned for the next rant… :D

Facebook a threat to feminine honour.

It’s taking a little while for this to sink in. Some things that happen in the world are so unspeakable that even though there seems to be one every week, your mind simply doesn’t want to acknowledge them.

H/T to Pharyngula for this link, a woman was beaten and shot dead by her father for talking on Facebook.

(The Pharyngula commentariat have suggested an International Fuck-In Against Religious Bullshit as a response. :-))

Sure this is in Saudi Arabia, where women have less rights than cattle, yet the very thought is so mind bogglingly ghastly the consciousness rebels against acceptance. In a civilised world the man would be charged with murder, most likely to spend a very, very long time in prison/psychiatric care.

The link is to a UK rag, the story has yet to hit here in Aus. It will be interesting to see how it’s presented here considering the way the media presents the ‘nets as the greatest threat to humanity since the plague. The same outlets that plaster semi-naked women’s bodies all over billboards and magazine covers hysterically shriek “save the children, o god, save the children!” whenever electronic communication in households is so much as implied. What remains largely unstated, as in this case, is that what we’re saving the children from is other men.

Why should this be, when so much of the world’s population is supposedly religious and religion is supposedly what gives human beings morals? Shouldn’t all vestiges of paedophilia and abuse have been cured years ago? Apparently not. Supposedly such illegal, destructive and narcissistic behaviour is proof not of the inherent misogyny of religions having made its way into human culture, but that all humans, particulary the women, are faulty. And it’s the fault of women for being so sexy that menfolk simply can’t control their base, evil natures.

Makes you wonder why we didn’t reinvent a worldview where people were encouraged to develop self-esteem and self-control rather than blaming the sex-caste for their own suffering.

In bashing and murdering his daughter, this father is basically exercising his right over her life. No other man can have sex with her or even talk to her over an internet connection, because he has now killed her. To keep his honour in tact. What sort of honour is it, I wonder, that requires child sacrifice? Honour like Abraham or Abraham’s god? Hmmm.

But before this descends into singling out Islam, though the murder took place in Saudi Arabia, one of the US’ closest military allies and a malignant miasma of misogyny, consider that it isn’t only Islam that subjugates and slaughters womankind. Indeed, it was christendom that gave us the doctrine of female subordination in mainstream culture. The church fathers were every bit as unstable and psychopathic as the father in this instance, such woman hating freaks as Augustine and Thomas Aquinas, who denigrated and defiled women, reducing us to mere walking uterii in the service of producing more males for their tantrum throwing deity to send into war or wipe out with plague for their inherent sinfulness… derived from women, of course.

While women in Pakistan are being sentenced to be gang raped for crimes against honour (!!) and women in Saudi Arabia are being killed for looking at a man, other women all over the world are being physically mutilated in the name of religion, women are being sexually, psychologically and financially abused the world over because men’s doctrines defines us as being the (un)worthy target of such abuses.

While church men might wring their hands and despair of the sinfulness of secular culture these days and be appalled at pornography, prostitution, paedophilia, rape and hatred of women, let’s not forget where the fuel and motivation for these ideas began. Religious men, bound by their religion into self-hatred and annihalation by the man made doctrines of sin and hell are not only unable to bear children to bring life into the world, but psychologically unable to beget life giving social contribution. Every creation seemingly positive is inevitably turned around for destruction. The earth, having been tainted with femaleness by the old reference to “mother nature” is also a target for hatred and mutilation. And where did these ideas originate? “Go forth and conquer”.

The original verse in Genesis has been observed to have been mistranslated. The word that is translated as “conquer” or “dominate” in other contexts is read as manage or even tend like a garden… but where it counts, male translators in male dominated cultures chose to create for themselves an excuse to pillage, rape and destroy to their little hearts’ content.

Much as there might be those within religious circles, such as my former Professors at Uni, who strive to correct such imbalances, and well they do otherwise millions of us who were brainwashed might never have any hope of discovering the alternative history of religious and political abuse that resulted in our current global oligarchy of bastardry, the destructive, self-hating, woman-hating nature of the construct is such that it will not change. The nature of the beast, the evil projected upon every perceived enemy of religion is at the very heart thereof and will not be exorcised.

It’s going to take many, many years of therapy for an awful lot of people before anything much changes in this regard. In the meantime, light a candle for the women of Saudi Arabie. And recognise the complicity of Western nations in maintaining the situation there by continuing arms and other trades with the foremost example of woman hating religious psychoses on the planet today.

If anyone knows what the young woman’s name was, I’d love to know. There ought to be a facebook group as legacy for her.

Commiserations and deep sympathy to her mother, sisters and friends.

Well, that explains it…

Over Summer the ever lengthening reading list included Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, Amit Goswami, Irshad Manji and Tariq Ali. The subsequent cross-breeding and strange procreation of ideas has been steadily gelling somewhere in the back of my tiny mind.

Dawkins made a point about certain behaviours or the presence of religious beliefs being a side effect of 6 million years of evolution.

It’s been dawning for a little while, that most of human behaviour that seems so stupid, confusing, self-defeating and downright lunatic is probably the by product of us being 99% similar to chimpanzees but having brought about the industrial revolution. We’re still bashing each other, pretending to be more important, dreaming up all sorts of reasons why Victorian class society should persist in cahoots with global thievery, blustering, posing, threatening, murdering and generally behaving like animals… because we are.

In the midst of ongoing battles with long term depression that can even include suicidal ideation, dealing with life in the knuckle dragging cock culture that is (only just) post-convict Australia, and wondering why the fuck anyone would want to live in the midst of a society that considers global abuses of women, children and the environment to be an acceptable or in any way appropriate way of life, this idea comes the closest to making sense of it all.

Sure we all have our own journies through life. Sure we need meaning, that’s a by product of developing a temporal lobe. Sure we need some connection to a community of other humans even if it’s only to climb over the piles of bleeding, mutilated bodies on our way to banking another billion in arms sales… But we’re animals. Only about 1% point different genetically from chimpanzees (no offence (to the chimps))

As much as the continuing abuses and lies of the Patriarchy get my fur in a bunch, realising that they’re all only apes explains it all, really. In fact it seems pretentious to want to change much, when considered from that perspective.

Embarrassingly enough, this all resonates with a comment made to me by a Krsna devotee a few years ago, that in order to avoid burning out over the stupidity and self-destruction of the human race, you need to focus on the things within your reach.

Now that I can cope with.

Doesn’t make me any happier about life in the kleptocracy, but it does explain a few things.

Another day another…. day?

There’s a post office around the corner from here and the managers are christians. There’s often cutesy little signs of some sort or another in the windows for various cult activities. One that caught my eye today was for the so called world youth day 2008.

The slogan on the poster says “The Pope and young people coming together.”


I really don’t think it’s only me. What with all the bad press certain priests have earnt in recent years, not to mention the inquisition, witch burning, holy wars, anti-Semitism and general misogyny and destruction in bucket loads. This did seem rather an odd, not to mention creepy, kind of thing to advertise.

How many people will be sending their offspring along to touch the Grand Inquisitor, I wonder? Well, any’s too many I guess.

The timing was perfect for tonight’s South Park episode!!!!! The writers were taking the piss out of easter and they were in fine form. From Stan questioning the logic of “a guy dies on a cross so we colour eggs and a rabbit hides them.” To Kyle killing Jesus so he can ressurect and stop the Pope from killing all the members of the Hare club for men, guardians of the ancient secret of the true Pope.

The whole sordid story was revealed to the boys by a character bearing some resemblance to a Dan Brown character, explaining that Leonardo da Vinci was a closet hare club member and painted rabbits ears on St Peter in the Last Supper. Turns out St Peter, allegedly the first Pope (despite the fact that Popes didn’t exist for hundreds of years after the fact) was a rabbit… Peter Rabbit? And the last supper was composed of eggs.

Apparently men are too easily led astray, but rabbits are pure. Makes more sense to put a rabbit in charge of organised religion. The guardians have been preserving the link between eggs, rabbits and easter ever since.

One hysterically funny point was the focus on the pope’s hat. It only makes sense if it were constructed to be worn by a rabbit… Which reminded me of the Ghost of Violet Socks over at Reclusive Leftist, a post got away in the comments into a discussion about men in some tribal societies (and suburbs) attempting to maintain an element of mystique or power through preservation of secrets and wearing of strange hats. (Damn I can’t find it now, but it was still a funny image.)

Benedict XVI, the Arch Inquisitor, was replaced by Bill Donohue from the US Catholic league when he was too soft to kill Jesus to preserve the church’s power base.

Jesus took him out with a five pointed throwing star… caught on the rebound… and paused for effect to slip on a pair of blades. Too cool! I nearly wet myself laughing!!

Was very funny to watch. Made a fantastic alternative to all the otherwise sanctimonious drivel which is equally as tenuously based.

As a Goddess worshiper myself I love that the rabbit and eggs are a last remaining leftover from early Pagan festivals that celebrated the Spring Equinox and the coming of Summer, planting, harvest, warmth and hopefully heaps of food, back when humans were much more tied to the earth and the cycle of the seasons. Although the christians appropriated the festival and turned it into a celebration of deicide and annihalation (doctrines of original sin and atonement shredding the last vestiges of self-esteem available to citizens of a murderous empire) there’s some connection in the human psyche that has seen the original symbols outlast the theft and misappropriation.


Happy easter. ;-)